Non-Verbal Communication and Tips for an Effective Hand Shake for Women

Compiled by Sachu Ramalingam

Non Verbal Communication

What we don't say bears more meaning than what we verbalize. We constantly transmit and receive non-verbal messages, often revealing our attitudes and feelings before we say a single word. Once you increase your awareness of these signs and develop your ability to read and understand them - you will greatly improve your ability to communicate and work effectively with others. Each posture, each movement, and each gaze - is a message sent from within. Try and figure out - what is the meaning of each posture? Body Language is the unspoken communication, those subtle messages conveyed without words that are transmitted and received in every Face-to-Face encounter with another human being. These include posture, facial expressions, gestures, mannerisms and your appearance. These messages tell you someone's true feelings towards you and how well your words are being received. Between 60-80% of our message is communicated through our Body Language, only 7-10% is attributable to the actual words of a conversation. Some psychologists claim that the impact you
make on others depends on what you say (7%), how you say it (38%), and by your body language (55%). Since how you sound also conveys a message, 93% of emotion is
communicated without actual words. It's often not what you say that influences others; it's what you don't say. The signals that you send nonverbally suggest attitude, understanding, empathy and ethics. The moment you meet another, they judge you by what they see and feel. The process takes less than 10 seconds but the impression is permanent. The signals that you send during this first contact may make or break a sale or change the outcome of any meeting. Your ability to read and understand another person's Body.

Language can mean the difference between making a great impression or a very bad one! It could help you in that job interview, that meeting, that business function, or special date!

Everyone has experienced the feeling that they have just been lied to, haven't they? The words of the conversation probably weren't what we noticed as a direct lie. It was more
likely to be the body movements and signals that gave them away. Darting eyes, palms not visible, shifting from one foot to another, hand covering mouth or fingers tugging at the ear are clues. All the clues are there. Our subconscious picks them up, and if we're lucky enough to be perceptive, decodes them and tells us that the words and gestures don't match!

Whenever there is a conflict between the words that someone says and their body signals and movements, we almost always believe their body! Non-verbal signs are very effective. They have a crucial influence on communicational processes, on the impression you create and the manner in which others treat you. Understanding the messages transmitted through the body is of considerable importance in order to improve communication skills, to advance your personal and professional targets and to increase personal effectiveness in inter-personal contacts.

So, being aware of the cues and signals being sent to you by others is a crucial skill if you want to understand a person's attitude towards you, regardless of what they are saying. Make Your Body Language Work for You! Learn how to use it to influence others or to create the right impact at first sight. To be effective in your communication and to gain the competitive edge in business, practice some of the following areas of body language.

1. NOTHING CROSSED. Keep arms, legs and feet relaxed and uncrossed. Also, if you are wearing a jacket, open it up. It relays the message I am open and honest with you.
2. LEAN FORWARD. Move within 6 to 8 feet of your client. Lean slightly forward. Interested people always pay attention and lean forward. Leaning backwards demonstrates aloofness or rejection.
3. MIRRORING. Pay attention to your clients breathing and the pace that they are talking at. Is it fast or slow, then mirror them. If they cross their legs, slowly do the same.
4. DIRECT EYE CONTACT. Direct eye contact is a compliment to most people and builds trust in you but be aware of the customs of people from other countries. It may be a sign of disrespect.
5. HANDSHAKE. Not too hard and not too soft. Pay attention to how you are shaking someone’s hand.

Source: Amended from Raam consultants- Body Language & Non Verbal
Communication

Tips for Effective Handshaking

1 Always shake from a standing position.
2 Make immediate eye contact, if possible, and smile.
3 Do not pull away from the handshake too quickly, as this sends a message that you don't want to get too close.
4 Hold the other person's hand for a split second longer than duty requires. This practice conveys confidence and pleasure in meeting the person.
5 Whenever possible, volunteer your name first. It shows confidence and self-control.
6 Offer your hand first and firmly grasp the other person's palm. Avoid clasping the other person's fingers, as this may appear condescending.
7 A man no longer has to wait for a woman to extend her hand first. Women should shake hands with each other as well as with male associates.
8 Repeat the name of the person to whom you are being introduced, for example, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Elaine." This is courteous; it also helps you remember the other person's name.
9 Be conscious of the strength of your grip. The "bonecrusher" handshake says that you are either a bully, or are insecure and have something to prove. Too soft a handshake speaks of insecurity.
10 Hand positions can communicate dominance or submission. An upturned palm indicates submissiveness. A down-turned palm shows a need for power.
11 To show warmth and sincerity you can use the two-handed handshake. Shake with one hand while clasping the outside of the person's hand with the other. Use this only with people you know very well.
12 If you are drinking a cold beverage, hold the glass in your left hand to avoid shaking with a clammy right hand.
13 Wear your nametag on your right side. It can be read more easily by the other person as you shake hands.
14 If you suffer from sweaty palms, keep a tissue in your pocket. Squeeze it prior to shaking hands. Washing your hands in advance with hot water will delay perspiration.
Source: Usheroff Institute